Xyz

There’s this guy that I’ve met for a good amount of years. I don’t think about him day and night, but when he posts on Facebook, or comments on Instagram, I notice.

I don’t want to notice. Can I just please disregard you like everyone else….

I don’t think I like him, no. When he’s with the girl he likes, I don’t feel jealous or anything. I know the girl, she’s sweet.

& I think deep down, I know he’s the closest one. But if there are no feelings, there are no feelings.

So be it then. Good luck in everything, anywhere that you go.

Xoxo

Christine

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When The Parent Who Left Contacts You On Facebook

Thought Catalog

Growing up, I rarely thought about my birth father. I didn’t want to think about someone that didn’t think about me, someone that could leave my mother, brother, and me alone. When I did think about him, it was in fits of anger: for my mother, and how she struggled to keep us afloat on her own; that maybe our lives would have been better is he was around; that I thought his presence would have somehow made everything okay. My mother did end up remarrying, to someone that was never a father figure to me, but that is another story entirely. My brother was my father figure, but he is absent in my life as well. It’s a reoccurring pattern that I can’t seem to shake.

In 2011, I was 23 and working the front desk of a ritzy salon, scanning the Internet, and I logged onto my Facebook…

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Rant/reflection

I cannot stand people that think they are so much older than me when it’s only one year. Seriously, please just calm down a little bit.

I’m stuck with this 19 year old guy that does closing shifts everyday…Literally I see him more than my mom. &Let’s just get it out there that’s he’s not the best looking guy.

Everything he does just annoys me so much. Every time he says something he just asks me why, or asks me to repeat myself.

‘ Coffee lite, no sugar. Coffee lite, no sugar. Coffee, lite, no sugar! COFFEEEEEE. LITEEEEE. NO SUGAR. ‘ shit!!

Okay, I understand. You’re not proficient in English, but repeating myself 99999 just makes me want to smack you. Especially since there’s a long line of customers in front of me.

One time he came to me with the extra milk left from a customer’s
Latte & goes ” want me to feed you? ” I gave him a very serious “No” and proceeded with washing all the equipment. Please do not bother me with dumb jokes when I have so much crap to do.

&I realize I’ve become sort of biest towards him. Him & another person can do the same thing but what he does will piss me off.
It’s bad, I know. I’m trying to change my views.

If he was a cute guy, my reaction would be so different. I would constantly be blushing and giggle all the time. I would listen to what he says and answer all his questions.

‘ Coffee lite, no sugar please! Coffee lite, no sugar! Coffee, lite, no sugar! Do you need help? Here, I’ll do it! ‘

This is all so bad.. I’m such a bad earthling…

Temporary freedom

I have the house to myself for a week. It’s my first night & already I can tell you one thing:

I am not going to be future pet owner. don’t get me wrong, I love my dog. I just don’t have enough time with her that she deserves. My best friend needs to come and feed/walk her during the week. I feel so bad )’:

I THINK I JUST FOUND THE MEANING OF LIFEEEEE

Okay, perhaps not. But I found a meaning to life. I’m going back to Hong Kong summer 2015. My sister is getting married and I’m going to be a bridesmaid!! (if nothing goes wrong) 

My life turned a total 360 since Friday. I came home crying about not wanting to go to work. Now I am actually looking forward to work and getting that $$ for Hong Kong. 

I think we all just need that motivation to keep us going. Thank the Lord!! 

ugh I have to start going to church again.. I’ve been so lazy it isn’t even funny.

I hate surprises & irresponsible people

I was pretty much forced to pay 600 almost 700 dollars this month for things I’m not responsible for. That’s practically one and a half of my paycheck. My mom is in Hong Kong, I’m still debating whether or not I should give her another 200 because I don’t want my older sister paying for her everything… She’s getting married and that itself is a lot to pay for.

Came home, saw the bill, and I cried.

I cannot stand people that cannot set their priorities straight and just leave others with messes to fix.

Sucks to suck… I try so hard to save & this is where my money goes. Someone please SOS. My perspective of sadness is reaching a level of 8. Possibly a 10.

Not a lot of things make me cry but money is always one of them. I feel silly crying over pieces of green paper.

Gratitude

PTL for patient people& construction workers.

I’m watching this sped teacher calmly explain to her one student that we actually lost an hour and not gained one. While he kept insisting that we had 25 hours on Sunday. God bless her soul, and patient teachers all around.

& while we are at it shout out to construction workers too. Saw a bunch of them the other day jackhammering away. There are so many underrated occupations out there. You have my gratitude.

A little sibling history

There’s four of us. Meaning I have 3 other siblings. Michelle and I are 17 years apart, Collin and I are 13 years apart , and Melody and I are 4. Collin and Michelle are my half brothers and sisters. It never feels that way though.

When I was born, Michelle was studying abroad in Switzerland. When she came back, Collin, melody and I all went to the US. All four of us never really spent time together.

The past summer we had one week together in Hong Kong. Saying its
the best week of my life is totally cliche, but it was definitely very memorable.

All four of us get along so well. You can combine any of us and we will be able to talk together. I think they are the biggest assets in my life. A very good gift from God. Thank you.